Joshua
...feeling insecure Joshua @stackhouseav

Secrets, looks, relationships

Ok, a big question. This could become NSFW. You’ve been warned.

I have wanted to talk about this with people who have psoriasis and hopefully there are some men out there who can chime in as well.

16

Theme Sex and Psoriasis

Please don't include specific medical product brand names or external links.

16 responses

Joshua
Joshua @stackhouseav

Big Q: How does your psoriasis affect your sexuality? Does it cause you to feel insecure? Do you feel less attractive? Guys, does it mess with your swagger? Ladies, does it affect your interest in a man (that is if you didn’t have psoriasis)?

This has plagued me for a fee years now. I have to talk about it.


nacho
nacho @nacho

Essentially, your ability to enter short term relationships go down drastically especially if you’re a young professional/ student in a big city because of several healthier alternatives for the opposite gender. It feels like your body is no longer what you’re competing with anymore in the market, so most encounters are based on longer term commitments. You feel left out because your friends with no psorasis have an easier time having a better sex life than you with much more abundant opportunities. So for the most part it feels terrible. It feels like you’re depreciating a lot faster than people surrounding you, and all of a sudden you feel like your body is just something that you’re renting for the time being.


Sarah
Sarah @sarahuk

Great question Joshua! I am married and so my long term partner is very much aware of my p and how it is part of me and my life, so that is kind of a given for me and I don't have to consider it very much. But I do wonder sometimes how it would be if my relationship were to end and I was back "out there"... how I would fare on the dating scene. And the answer is I really don't know! I guess I feel that my psoriasis would be one thing out of many that I would be apprehensive about... my wobbly bits, my private bits, my looks, my hair, my grooming blah blah blah. But I guess loads of people get like this when dating no matter what they look like and if they have p or not! I always believe that most people have some sort of "health stuff" to worry about and if it isn't p it is something else. Before I met my husband my p was worse than it is now, and I guess I managed to get out there and lure him in with whatever weapons I had, psoriasis and all! But it is hard, no doubt about it 😐


Michelle
Michelle @mishlyn

Insecurities have definatley played factor over the years Joshua. I think its our minds that can stop us from pursuing others more than our skin. I feel blessed in the sense that being cautious who I allow in my life and share my skin with has allowed me to be able to find deep Love, more than once. It does not effect me now, as my husband is my biggest supporter and makes me feel sexy even when my skin has been on fire. A persons skin would not determine if I wanted to get to know them more, but rather their core values and Love they have for others. We dont want to be with superficial people anyhow..so anyone who judges us on skin can keep on walking.. We are all meant to love and be loved..the right person is out there for all of us, we just need to be open to recieve it ❤


Michelle
Michelle @michelle1021

Hi Joshua. My P did cause me to feel insecure. A lot. I felt like an ugly duckling. Never looked people in the eye when they spoke to me and by being that insecure, I became a horrible person. Rude, Obnoxious, verbally abusive, and that only because I wanted the attention to go away from me. I felt like a lizard. THAT, was all in my mind. Psychologically. I wasn't interested in a man and when they looked at me, my mind told me that they are looking right through my clothing and seeing my P. I was Pathetic. Luckily I had a wonderful man in my life whom supported me and made me feel so beautiful. Well...eventually my P went away and I have changed. During my flare where I was covered in P, I never wanted to have sex with my ex although it never bothered him (my skin of course) but I have to be honest and say "no". Dating a guy whom has P won't affect my interest. I have never been a person who went for looks anyway. I would rather say that, everything would depend on his psychological mind.


 John,Toxin portal patch
John,Toxin portal patch @chewbacca

Nope, i am a lifer born with so i have had to deal with it all my life , i have been in quite a lot of relationships short and long ones,i just talk about it as i have to if i want a relationship or what ever ,yes it has affected me sometimes with having it down there but,thats me and not the other person,i found no one cares that much, if you tell them like a warning, its always worked for me as i do and get a bit worried about it and i think why did i worry, its about you and not your skin,we all have quirks,something thats not perfect,i wish you well Joshua


Joshua
Joshua @stackhouseav

Thanks fellas. It’s very comforting and reassuring to hear about your experiences.


graham
graham @graham5

psoriosis on your willy stops you dead scabby flakey willy is not pretty so my sex life is ruined in that way but still can do other stuff


Michelle
Michelle @michelle1021

Wonderful to hear that you are still positive about doing other stuff Graham. :)


 John,Toxin portal patch
John,Toxin portal patch @chewbacca

Sorry to hear this graham, i avoid ordinary sex, oral sex is less strain on the bad boy i have found, hope i can say this ? ordinary sex is a pain unless one got a lot lube, hope i can say this?glad you can do other stuff graham :)


Michelle
Michelle @michelle1021

One never knows if a bit far is TOO FAR. lol. I don't see a problem in what you said John, how else can one talk about it and maybe find a solution? :)


 John,Toxin portal patch
John,Toxin portal patch @chewbacca

Well most of us are adults here i think Michelle,i am sure most of us know about the birds and the bees :) thank you :)its easier to say it as it is i think and maybe some people share my view on this :)


 John,Toxin portal patch
John,Toxin portal patch @chewbacca

So true Michelle, a solution :)


Sarah
Sarah @sarahuk

I think it's great to discuss options! Sex is just another part of life. And is actually so important for wellbeing isn't it!



Michelle
Michelle @michelle1021

I'm sure everyone shares your view on this topic John. Like Sarah said, sex is another part of our life and it plays a big role to our wellbeing as well. It needs to be discussed in a mature way and not in a filthy way as if this is a porn site. Lots of P sufferers would love to hear what works and don't and some don't have the courage to talk to others about the problem. We are all human and we all have the same body parts. Well...you know what I mean.



Sign in to view all responses

By signing up, I agree to the terms of use, privacy & cookie policy, community guidelines and subscribe to email newsletters from Flaym.

Signup with Facebook


Why do I need to sign in?

Flaym is a supportive psoriasis community that depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they got something to share.

Joshua Never miss a post from Joshua, when you
sign up for Flaym. Learn more
Join our community